Fuck you for ruining me,

for giving me a completely unrealistic

expectation of what relationships should be.

Fuck you for seeing stars in my eyes,

and the moon in Venus.

Fuck you for making me your opium,

coming daily, like a true addict,

spending hours getting your fix,

feeding off and draining me completely

Fuck you for being a coward,

for lacking the ability to let go of fear

Fuck you for taking my soul

with your mouth, your words,

your kiss, your taste-

fresca and marlboro reds

Fuck you for not keeping this love sacred,

forsaking all else,for not accepting our gift

with tears of gratitude and mercy

Fuck you for not letting go-

for holding every word, card, letter

captive

under wide plank floorboards

in the farmhouse we dreamed eternity in

Fuck you for being crystal clear in my vision-

past and present

so much so that every new relationship,

every change,

brings me full circle once more.

Fuck you for not asking permission

to hold my heart-

in your eyes, your hands,

your voice, your mouth.

Fuck you for rising to the challenge-

for loving me with equal

intensity and passion

Yes, fuck you.

But most of all,

fuck you for loving me enough

to walk

away.